Spin Cycle
by Matthew Fetterman


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1. A Routine Repair Job


  Twelve men, all around their mid-twenties, sat around the spacious room, lounging in comfortable leather chairs. Some of them were playing cards, others were reading. They were all dressed semiformally, wearing white button-down shirts, and sport jackets. Also, they all wore identical gold watches. They looked like they could have been lawyers, or stockbrokers. They weren't. They were laundry repairmen.
  The dispatcher, Mr. Weiss, sat at a desk in one corner of the room. The phone rang. The men stopped whatever they were doing and looked up. "Interstellar Laundry Service," Mr. Weiss answered. He listened to the caller. "No, no, ILS doesn't do your laundry for you. We install and repair machines." He listened again. "Okay, sorry we couldn't help you." The men went back to their endeavors.
  The phone rang again, and this time Mr. Weiss wrote down the information that the caller gave him. "Pavel and Alexsi," called Mr. Weiss. "We've got a broken XRK-11 machine up on Pluto. Take a cruiser and check it out."
  Pavel and Alexsi, two men who generally worked together as a team, got up. Alexsi hurried over to the dispatcher. "Are we a good choice for this job?" asked Alexsi. "I don't know how to fix the XRK-11. I'd need to be trained for weeks before I could fix that!"
  "Well, Smith and Fine are out this week. They are the guys that usually work on the XRK-11, so you guys are the next best choice, I think. All the XRK-11 manuals are over there. I'm sure it will be a minor problem. Just grab the manuals, you'll do fine," replied the dispatcher.
  Alexsi was about to argue, but Pavel stopped him. Pavel shook his head, and the two of them went and found the sixteen white folders that held all the information about the XRK-11. It was something of an anachronism that they still used manuals, still used screwdrivers and wrenches. Even in their technologically advanced age, it was still found that the simplest solutions were still the best. They grabbed their toolboxes and ambled into one of the cruisers. Pavel flipped the ignition switch, pressed the Turbo button, and typed their destination into the computer. He felt the rumble of the ship's engines as they left the Earth. The computer monitor told him that they would be on Pluto within a couple of hours.
  Pavel made himself a cup of coffee and sipped it reflectively, leaning back in one of the cruiser's comfy seats. Pavel was a big man, about six-foot two and with a broad, muscular build. If a car hit Pavel, that car would need major body work. He liked to wear a leather jacket and boots, and listen to the punk rock group Dead Roach. Pavel was twenty-six years old, and a little frustrated to be working as a technician. He had always hoped to be a scientist, actually. However, he had immigrated to the United States from Russia, and this had set his education back, and forced him to take a job. Pavel was generally fairly quiet, tending to average a word or two a day. He had a slight stutter, and didn't speak English that well, so this contributed to his quiet nature. Altogether, Pavel seemed a rather intimidating figure, but he was really a teddy bear.
 Alexsi was exactly the opposite of Pavel. He stood about five-foot-ten, but he was very skinny. Alexsi was so skinny that if he turned sideways, he would just about disappear. Except for his thick curly red hair. He was approximately the same age as Pavel, and also hoped to become a scientist. And he was also from Russia. Alexsi was always talking, even when no one was listening. When he was with Pavel, Alexsi would always be talking. Pavel would nod occasionally. To the causal observer, it would seem as if Alexsi was an annoyance to Pavel, like a small annoying bug. However, those who knew them well realised that they formed an excellent team, and that Pavel really was listening to Alexsi. In a way, Alexsi was like Woodstock and Pavel like Snoopy.
  On board the cruiser, Pavel and Alexsi thumbed through the manuals. After an hour, Alexsi stood and stretched. "Maybe I should summarise what we've learned so far," said Alexsi.
  Pavel nodded.
  Alexsi stepped over to the center of the cruiser control room. "The XRK-11 is one of our most advanced products. It is a washer/dryer that offers a particulate level of less than 10 particulates per square foot of fabric, a level which makes previous machines look ancient. The cost of the XRK-11 is astronomical- to own this washer/dryer costs about the GNP of a small country. But to some, it is worth it. Quite a status symbol."
  Pavel nodded again. It didn't bother Alexsi that Pavel didn't talk very much, for this just gave Alexsi more time to talk.
  "The washer works on the principle of micromachines," said Alexsi. "Put your laundry in, and water flows into the washer, and in the first cycle, we use soap. This works quite well for most dirt. However, there are certain kinds of dirt that have been shown to be quite resistant to soap. So after rinsing the clothes, we immerse them in water that contains micromachines. The machines- no bigger than a dust particle- search the fabric for particles that are non-fabric like. Once such a particle is found, the machines clump together, and like little ants, they carry that particle away." As Alexsi spoke, he drew on the holographic control unit, producing three-dimensional images of the micromachines within the washer.
  "Hmm," said Pavel.
  Alexsi ran his hands through his thick red hair, and paused for a moment. "The dryer starts by using ultrafast lasers to dry the clothes. The lasers provide a quick and accurate way to get the clothes perfectly dry. Furthermore, they do not subject the clothes to the stress that a normal spinning dryer would. By the way, notice that the washing and drying takes place within the same chamber, thus reducing the cost of the unit. Also I should have mentioned that the energy source of all of this is a small fusion reactor, which consumes a few tons of helium per year. Very cheap."
  Pavel had started to take notes on Alexsi's presentation.
  Alexsi continued. "Now the clothes are dry, so they must be folded. To fold the clothes, we fold the fabric of space. According to the space-folding equations, there are two ways to fold space. In the first way, space is folded and the objects inside are folded with it. In the second way, space is folded but the objects inside that space do not move. So how do we get the clothes from their crumpled state to a neatly pressed state?"
  Pavel shrugged his shoulders, to indicate that he did not know the answer. He sipped his coffee.
  "Well first we fold up space to the same shape as the clothes, without moving the clothes within that space. That uses the first space-folding technique that I mentioned, where we fold space without altering the objects. Then we unfold the space and the clothes simultaneously, so that we are left with the folded clothes."
  "Two stages to folding clothes," Pavel wrote in his notebook.
  "If you just tried skipping the first step, if you just folded the clothes and space simultaneously, then when you took the clothes out, the space around those clothes would always be folded. But this way, the space is folded to assume the same shape as the clothes, so that when the clothes are folded, the space will still have the same shape as the clothes. Temporarily, space will be distorted, but once the clothes are folded, then space will return to its normal shape."
  "And why is this space-folding useful?" asked Pavel.
 "Well, you never have to touch the clothes during the process, so that the particulate level is not increased by the folding. Also, it allows the computer to fold the clothes very precisely."
  Pavel sipped his coffee again.
 Alexsi searched through the manual. "One more point. The XRK-11 is completely safe and there is no possibility of danger to the user or technician. One important precaution that you should remember is to disconnect the power before working on the space-folding apparatus. Otherwise, it may cause sparks, which could damage the space-folding apparatus." Alexsi closed the manual. "Well, that's it, just turn off the power before fixing it and we'll be fine."
  Alexsi smiled. "Say," said Alexsi, "isn't it time to watch Funky McChicken?" Alexsi turned on the holographic television, and found the right channel. "That's right, it's on now!" He guffawed at the animated antics of Funky.
  Pavel shook his head in dismay. "How you can watch that...that trash?" Pavel was clearly in a good mood, however. This was evidenced by the fact that he had spoken much more than his usual quota for an entire week!
 In a short time, the spaceship landed on the planet with a bump, and the two stepped out, tools in hand. The manager greeted them warmly. Feng Li, the manager of the XRK-11 facility, was a radiant young woman, Chinese, with an athletic build. "Welcome to Pluto. We'll have to have lunch after you get through with fixing the machine."
 "That would be great," said Alexsi enthusiastically. "It's quite an unusual city you have here!"
  "Yes," replied Li. "As you can see, the city is laid out in a precise grid. It stretches for hundreds of miles. Any place in the grid can easily be specified by giving its three dimensional coordinates. The first two coordinates give the x-y position of the store, and the third coordinate tells how high it is. It's very convenient, really. Much better than the conventional street names. I'll show you around later."
 Pavel cleared his throat. He wanted to make sure that they fixed the machine before Alexsi found himself too distracted by the beautiful Li.
  "Why don't you tell us what the problem with the machine seems to be," Alexsi asked, picking up on Pavel's hint.
  "Oh," said Li, "just a minor problem with the dryer. At least I think its the dryer. Clothes are coming out dirty, more than 20 particulates per square meter. And the dryer is making some funny noise." Pavel and Alexsi followed Li to a white door marked "Authorised Personnel Only."
  "We'll have a look," said Alexsi. Pavel and Alexsi stepped into the room behind the white door, the gowning room. In this room, both he and Alexsi donned white gowns, booties, and hats. This was to ensure that none of the particles from their body would contaminate the ultra- clean workings of the laundry apparatus. In their outfits they looked anonymous, neither male nor female, except that Pavel stood slightly taller than Alexsi. Pavel used his key to open the door labelled "Restricted Access, Authorised Personnel Only."
  Pavel and Alexsi entered into the Machine Room, which contained the inner workings of the XRK-11 machine. Pavel stood back while Alexsi looked around the room. "Okay, Alexsi, why don't you run the diagnostics."
  "Okay," replied Alexsi. "I'm inspecting the indicator lights, looks like all systems are nominally functional."
 "Good," said Pavel.
 "Well," said Alexsi. "The manual says to turn on the machine and let it go on a trial run. See if any problems crop up during the cycle."
 Pavel nodded.
 Alexsi stepped over to the main computer that controlled the XRK-11, a supercomputer with over seventy- five megashooters of RUM. He typed in the command for the machine to start its cycle.
 Pavel and Alexsi watched together as the water flowed into the washing machine. Soon, the water flowed out and the micromachines entered the machine. Alexsi monitored the charge and temperature of the fluid. "Looks okay," he commented.
  After the washing cycle was over, the washing machine became a dryer. Ultrafast lasers extended into the machine, shooting their rays at the clothes. Having done their work, the ultrafast lasers retracted. Now capacitor grids on the side of the machine heated up. They created a focussed electromagnetic wave that distorted the space-time fabric. And, if this wave was correctly adjusted, space would be folded in such a way as to correctly fold the clothes.
  And the machine was done. Pavel and Alexsi inspected the folded clothes that the machine had laid on the counter. Then Alexsi read the computer report. "Hmm," he said. "Our isobaric sensor array shows that these clothes have too high a particulate concentration, so that the machine isn't working properly. Maybe its the dryer. Usually that's the part of the XRK-11 that tends to break down, according to the manual. I'll open it up and have a look. First I'll turn off the circuit breaker so as to avoid causing sparks."
 Pavel nodded.
 Alexsi opened the manual. "Shut off circuit breakers 10 and 12," he read. Carefully he shut off the circuit breakers. Then he fished around in his tool box for a screwdriver and removed the panel of the XRK-11. There were sixteen screws, so it took a while. "I think Li likes me better than you," Alexsi told Pavel.
 "No," said Pavel. Pavel looked inside the XRK-11 and used his voltmeter to probe the electric potentials.
 "No!" said Alexsi. "She was staring at me!" Suddenly a spark shot out from the panel. It shot through Pavel, who dropped like a rock to the floor.
 The air shimmered in front of Alexsi. A swirling cloud formed around him, glowing a rainbow of colours. Alexsi screamed. The cloud faded and the room appeared normal.
 

2. A Minor Problem.


  "Damn!" Alexsi swore. Quickly he shut the entire machine down. "I thought I turned off the circuit breaker." He opened the manual. "Oh, I see. In the fine print here, it says that you should also shut off circuit breaker 13. I'm really sorry about that, Pavel." He looked at Pavel mournfully. Pavel was out cold on the floor, completely oblivious to Alexei's sincere apologies. He appeared to be breathing normally, so Alexei just assumed that he would be all right for the moment.
  Alexsi opened the manual, and flipped through the pages. "Troubleshooting, troubleshooting...here it is. Shorting out the machine. Shorting out the machine may warp the fabric of space-time. There are many possible effects that this could have."
  "They've really done a very thorough job in this manual," Alexsi commented to Pavel, who could not hear him. He read on. "Most of these effects involve painful deaths. Of course it is possible that nothing will happen at all, if the machine is shorted out. That is the optimal situation."
  Alexsi remembered the cloud that had formed about him. "No, I don't think that nothing happened. I think that something happened." He returned to the manual. "Therefore, if one should happen to find that you are alive, and that something has happened to the space-time generator, you may well be in what we call the Wronksian condition, which was predicted by Professor Wronski. Such a situation has never happened. However, in the unlikely event that it does, we enclose a paper by Professor Wronski. We hope that you will find it interesting reading!"
  "Hmm," said Alexsi. "I've read some of Wronski's work. Very imaginative fellow." Alexsi found the article. "Here it is, space-time flipping by Professor W.A. Wronski." Alexsi looked down at Pavel, who was moving a little bit.
  "Consider the space-time fabric," Alexsi read. "There are three spatial dimensions and one temporal dimension. In those three spatial dimensions, we can move in any which way we want. However, in the temporal dimension, we are constrained to move in only one direction, at a constant rate."
  "That's true," said Alexsi. "He's just saying that we can move however we want in space, but we always go forward at the rate of 1 second per second in time." Alexsi flipped the page. "Now, imagine that through some fortuitous accident, the temporal dimension and one of the spatial dimensions were flipped. In this scenario, your world would look the same. That is, you would still tell time on your watch, and you would still move in space. But in one spatial dimension, say North, you would be compelled to move North at the rate of one foot per foot. And as for time, now you could move anywhere you wanted in time- backwards, forwards."
  Alexsi thought for a minute. "Hmm. He's saying that right now we are free to move spatially but constrained to move only one dimension in a constant rate in time. But what if you were constrained to move in a certain way spatially, but you could move any which way you wanted in time? That would be quite interesting."
  Alexsi continued to read. "The other two dimensions would be unaffected. You could still move as you want to move East-West and Up-Down. It is only the North-South axis and the temporal axis that would be affected. Of course we are speaking very roughly in using the terms North- South and East-West and Up-Down, what we really mean is-" and here Alexsi ran into a stream of mathematical symbols.
  Alexsi mused, "Now what does that mean, moving at the rate of one foot per foot in the spatial dimension. It sounds a little silly. But then again, saying that we are compelled to move through time at the rate of one second per second sounds a little silly, too."
 Pavel stirred groggily. "Just relax," Alexsi told him. "Apparently you'll have plenty of time to recover"
 Pavel staggered to his feet. "Uhh."
  "Well," said Alexsi. "We've made a minor mistake and switched a spatial dimension with a temporal dimension. You had a small electrical shock running through your body. Actually, you should have seen yourself drop, it was just like a scene from Funky McChicken!"
 "Wronski phenomena," Pavel muttered. "Not good."
 "That's right," said Alexsi. "It's not good." Alexsi looked around the room wildly. "Pavel, we're moving!" Indeed, the two men were headed for the wall in front of them. Even though they were not walking, still they were moving, much as if they were at a People Mover at DisneyLand.
  "The door!," said Pavel. They hurried towards the door, opened it, and glided through.
 "Whew!" said Alexsi. "We would have been crushed against the wall if we hadn't made it though the door!"
 Feng Li stood outside the door. She had been waiting for them to complete their work. "Everything okay now?" she asked.
  "Oh, yes, fine, fine, everything is working fine," Alexsi responded, trying to sound convincing.
 "Er...slow down," she said. "Maybe you can tell me the details of what you did. She hurried to keep up with Pavel and Alexsi. "Where are you going?"
 "I'm sorry," said Alexsi. "We have another job to fix. It's quite important. We'll send you the bill." In truth, of course, Alexsi and Pavel could not change the direction or speed of their motion.
 "Contact Wronski," Pavel said.
 "That's right," said Alexsi. He turned to Feng Li. "Could you do us a favor and contact a scientist named Wronski back on Earth. Tell him to meet us at...the intersection five blocks outside this building. Tell him that there's no need to hurry, any time will be satisfactory. We'd certainly appreciate that."
 Li nodded. "All right, I'll contact him. But the exit isn't even in the direction you're going. Just a plate glass window..." Feng Li gave up trying to keep up with them. She was wearing high heels and and skirt, and had difficulty moving quickly. Instead, she decided just to stand and watch the two men. She figured that they would turn and come back once they realised that their path ended at a window.
 Alexsi was still experimenting with the new situation. "Look, Pavel. I can walk normally in this direction, and in this direction. But if I walk in this direction, nothing happens. I am still moving at the same rate." In fact, the two were gliding down the corridor, and no matter what they attempted, they were still moving down the corridor at the same rate.
  "Watch," said Pavel. "Look at ceiling clock." The clock read 3:19 PM. "Now hold on to me, we'll run in this direction." The two of them ran in the direction of the corridor. Their running did not change the rate at which they were gliding down the corridor. But as they ran, the clock started changing rapidly. Now it read 3:20, and now 3:21. They tried running faster, and indeed the clock changed faster. Then they tried running in the opposite direction. Now the clock was moving backward, until finally it rested at 3:19, where they had started.
  "Exactly as Wronski predicted," said Alexsi. "You see, when we move in the direction of this corridor, we don't change our spatial motion. But we do change the motion of time."
  "That's fascinating," said Alexsi, as the two of them moved down the corridor. Alexsi grabbed a cup of coffee that stood on a cart as he went by. "Hmm," said Alexsi. "This coffee is quite cold." Alexsi ran in the direction of the corridor. "...and now it is pleasantly warm!"
  "Look at your watch," said Pavel. "See that as you move, it remains constant. So it is a local effect, our time doesn't change. Just the time around us. But still, we'd better stick together. Each time you change time, we should do it together. Otherwise, things may get confusing."
 "Uh-oh," said Alexsi. "There's just a window at the end of this corridor, the plate glass window that Feng Li pointed out. We're going to smash into it!"
 "At least its on the first floor," said Pavel. "Get behind me!" Alexsi stood behind Pavel as the two of them smashed through the window. They couldn't avoid it, because they had to move in that direction. Glass flew everywhere, but fortunately they were not hurt. Behind them, Feng Li watched, open-mouthed in surprise that the two had apparently decided to jump through a window for no reason.
  "Another problem," yelled Alexsi. "See that intersection up ahead? Cars going everywhere. We'll get run over, for sure!"
  "Hmm," said Pavel. "Now would be a good time to change time."
  As the two of them moved towards the busy intersection, they began running in the direction of their motion. The sun set, and it became night. Now the cars had their headlights on. Finally it became the dead of night, and there were hardly any cars in the street. When Pavel and Alexsi reached the intersection, there were no cars, and the two crossed safely.
  "We made it!" shouted Pavel.
  "Yeah!" Alexsi shouted.
  The End
  Author's Note...
  Hey y'all, well actually this is not the end, but I wanted to see if any readers were left by this point!